Did you know that within the 50 United States, 640 million acres are owned by the U.S. Government. This equals more than one fourth of the total land mass of the country. That’s a lot of land.
In the state of Nevada, the U.S. Government owns 80.1% of the land, most of which is desert. It is, of course, the home of the infamous Area 51 and other classified sites.
One of the classified sites recently discovered by a small group of campers is an underground bunker. It is not any ordinary bunker. It is a bunker that contains a city with all the trimmings: air purification system, water system, hospital, family rooms, all types of electronics and comfort features including spas and pools.
Because the entrance to this bunker-city is situated between some large rock formations and almost invisible from the air or surrounding areas, there is no need for a fence or guards at this point. It is currently uninhabited and likely designed to hide and save our political elites in any future national emergency.
The campers reported that as they approached the bunker they saw a small truck with a group of civilian men leaving the site with the door to the bunker still open. They assumed they were returning to their point of origination to gather further supplies.
The campers took this opportunity to cautiously approach the door and enter. Finding no evidence of human life, they entered. Low level lighting made exploring safe but slow. During their exploring venture they discovered the layout and the high end amenities built into the facility.
They also found a row of locked red phones on a wall with labels. Some of the labels they saw were President, Vice President, White House, Speaker of the House, Chief of Staff, Joint Chiefs of Staff, and Secretary of Defense. This confirms that this facility is the product of the Federal Government.
The explorers were shocked when they found a large prison like room labeled “Trump Supporters.” The room was probably this size of four or more football fields.
There was one small toilet, a water bucket, a few sponges and a large supply of Preparation H. The rest of the room was dark and bare. One exception was a corner of the room with a low voltage bulb hanging over a small table. The table held piles of speeches by Biden, Obama, Chuck Schumer, and Adam Schiff.
After this discovery, the group became fearful and hastily left the bunker. They also realized that they were likely being monitored via video cameras that were seen around the city. However, during their explorations they were able to capture a large amount of photographs and videos that they shared with us.
Several weeks later, one of our reporters went to talk further with one of the people in the group. This person had supplied their business card so we could follow up.
When our reporter arrived at the man’s business address the owner of the business said the person we were seeking had suddenly quit and left the area. No one knows where he is. Apparently, he is now totally off the grid.
A week later though, we found out that this man landed in Cuba in a rubber raft. He was arrested and really has disappeared. As to the others, we have no further information.
satire - noun — the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
The Washington Exterminator is a satirical news website.