In the wake of the removal of the Aunt Jemima brand, the removal of the native American woman from the Land O’Lakes logo, and the latest controversy surrounding the Washington Redskins mascot, there is a new group of Americans standing up against American colonialism.
The H.C.M.A, or Hair Challenged Men of America, recently signed a petition to Procter & Gamble calling for a new mascot. 54,652 signatures have been collected so far. “Our goal is one million signatures,” said HCMA President Matt White.
“Frankly, I’m tired of seeing the stereotype of fit bald white men as nothing more than sex objects for housewives,” said group member Steve S from Denver. “We are more than that. We have feelings too.”
HCMA has asked Bruce Willis to speak on their behalf at an upcoming Rally in D.C., but his agent reported that he has yet to decide if he will accept this high honor.
Men’s Health Magazine will be featuring a story on this brewing controversy in their August 2020 issue. Proctor & Gamble has not responded to our request for their response.
satire - noun — the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
The Washington Exterminator is a satirical news website.